Thursday, March 05, 2009

Breathing In Photosynthesis Poop

It’s like this way: Everything gets recycled, whether we like it or not. There is a grand circle of things in the universe, where stuff goes round ‘n round.

One fine day, quite a while ago, a star blew up, really bad. All the stuff that got ejected, which is all of it, started blowing out into the universe and we are made of whatever ended up in this part of it. We are that star’s recycle bin, if you want to put it in those rather stark and unromantic terms. “Stardust” might be better.

Down here on Planet Stardust, we have lots of green plants which exist courtesy of photosynthesis. Sunbeams drop down from heaven, plants raise their little leaves up in supplication, take in carbon dioxide and donate oxygen, which we breathe.

“Donate oxygen”? You mean they eat co2 and crap o2? And we breathe that stuff? We need to inhale 21,600 amounts of plant poop in order to live just every day.

Disgusting.

Of course, we’re also drinking Columbus’ pee, if you figure the guys took a leak over the edge of the boats and, all these years later, the stuff mixed in the oceans, was evaporated and then came down to fill our reservoirs. You don’t think there’s been an unending supply of fresh water coming down from outer space all these years, did you? Now go and fertilize your strawberries.

4 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Okay. Yuz has been livin in NEPA for a long time now, haina or no. When ya saz tree turds, do you mean three or tree? Either one sounds bad.

March 06, 2009 3:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

In W.Va. it's pronounced "yunz."Always remember that Dialect as well as local customs give a region or part of our country its own characteristic.
D.

March 06, 2009 6:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

And in Bridgeport, Ct it is ''youse''.

My grandmother never heard of cholesterol, I didn't either until about 25 years ago. We always figured that tap water came from a resevoir somewhere north of town. today they are selling bottled water take nfrom springs, so they say. There was a neat spring in a town near here, Lauzon, and everone would fill up there and it was supposedly the best water thatcouldbe drank..that is until they discovered that it ran under an old cemetery! ''Bone-Filtered Water, the Bestin Town''. Well they shut it down, but you know I'd rather use that water than the water that the town is ''making'' over in an abandoned sand pit.

Fellow I know works in a pig farm, which are numerous around here. He says he wouldn't eat pork even if he was paid to eat it. (A bit like my daughter but that's another deal LOL).

So we are living in a dump atmosphere...breathing it, drinking it and eating it. How long will it last?

How about this'' Bio Maple Syrup''?

Do yuz, yunz,youse really believe that crap?

I was at a farmers' market last fall and the guy was selling bio-garlic at a rather higher price ( the word BIO = $$$). I asked him whathe put on his garlic and he said thathe uses no chemical stuff, only tables craps, maure and all the stuff we used to use back in the day which was free. This is interesting because I too raise garlic. Well I asked him that if he used only natural stuff, then he saved money on buying chemicals etc. then why does he sell his product at a higher price than other garlic?

CJV

March 08, 2009 7:44 AM  
Blogger Tom Carten said...

Check the bottled water in the store. If it has a little "PWS" on the label, that stands for "Public Water Supply."

It may be filtered, but you're paying a lot of money for what comes out of a faucet and through a screen.

March 08, 2009 11:28 AM  

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