Friday, October 30, 2009

No Armored Cars At Cemeteries

“He’s the richest man in St. Michael’s Cemetery,” my father said to me about Old Man Ryan. The guy owned some rather important land, which had been sold to a rather important developer for some rather important money. But, sorry to say, Old Man Ryan found he couldn’t take it with him. There were no armored cars at the cemetery.

I don’t begrudge someone having money; I certainly don’t mind *me* having a little stockpile of dead presidents on green pieces of paper. The coin of the realm is always welcome in my little home by the side of the road. Like Dolly Levi, in the musical, snuggling up to her cash register, “It’s a little lumpy, but it rings.”

Yet, I wonder about these rich people whose wealth is measured in far more than they can possibly spend. Money is meant to be used, like food.

Maybe it’s a million dollars, maybe more, maybe lots less. But there’s no sense at all in having $50 million late in life when all you can do with it is have your accountant tell you how much you have. Scrooge McDuck was like that: large buildings full of money, but too cheap to have fun with it.

H. L. Hunt, the billionaire, went to his grave having never given a cent to charity; he was afraid it might somehow benefit the communists. Others worked hard until they died and I wonder if they ever thought of the vacations they missed because they put everything off in search of that extra million.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well, you can and you can't. Did you watch Michael Jackson's funeral? Remember the gold coffin?

October 30, 2009 1:35 PM  
Blogger Tom Carten said...

Guy wants to take it all with him so he bargains with God to have it changed into gold bricks and take it to heaven.

The angels see him coming and say, "Why is he bringing paving blocks with him?"

October 30, 2009 7:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

As we say here in Québec,

''The safe doesn't follow the hearse''

Exit 318

November 03, 2009 5:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The way to get around that is to become a firm believer in re-incarnation, take out a million insurance policy and name yourself as the beneficiary


November 03, 2009 5:07 PM  

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