Monday, May 25, 2009

Then The Cockroach Cut One

On the average of every 15 minutes. Little pops, bigger bangs, cellar-clearing blow-outs.

My brother and I are jealous, as are most guys. Scientists who have all the luck and apparently not enough time on their hands have set up a sort of “cockroach fart research center” to see just how much breakage of wind these little critters can do.

As I said, too much time, too little to do.

Turns out, when a cockroach lifts its hind leg a bit and smiles, the silent-but-deadly is part of the estimated 20% of all methane emissions produced by these little rude creatures. And they can get away with it, too, because the American Cockroach can scoot away at speeds approaching two mph – pretty fast for someone who doesn’t have to run too far for cover.

Termites do their best, also, to make the planet hot (and smelly) along with major offenders cows and goats. As gross as guys get, they hardly show up on the scale. Sorry, guys; you just don’t cut it. (Sorry for the pun.)

So the next time you feel that familiar pressure building up and it gets to the point where you just know it’s Apocalypse Now, after the dust settles and your best beloved comes out of hiding, tell her that it could be a lot worse. Over the farms in the Sacramento Valley rises a brown cloud that permeates everything.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I could venture further into this subject......but I won't


May 28, 2009 6:54 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wonder who funds these programs?

May 28, 2009 9:41 AM  
Blogger Tom Carten said...

Probably people who are trying to find out where all the methane in the atmosphere is coming from. If we can control it, we can do something about global warming.

Remember that next time you have a big plate of sauerkraut.

May 28, 2009 10:18 AM  
Blogger kevin coper said...

Nice to meet you admin.
here my recent review article about cockroaches and
you can read them here cockroaches thanks

May 07, 2017 10:50 AM  

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