Things You Shouldn't Buy Used

I would not want to buy a used parachute. I’m sure a properly packed and inspected ‘chute on the used market will be just fine, but I think I’d have a funny feeling going up with one. Should anything go wrong and I’m trying to get it deployed, I’d be thinking, “For just a few dollars more, I could be celebrating my next birthday.”

A used car from a dealer near the pier in New London CT. I was there once and saw a sign that said, “Hey, Sailors! Cheap Cars!” Not sure if I’d want one of those.

Nor would I buy a used car that did not have a VIN plate in the front window.

Speaking of cars, I’d avoid the aisle that was stocked with “Used Oil.” Or “Used Fan Belts.” Or “Used Timing Chains.” Not good.

I think a used sex toy would also be out of the question.

If a single guy wanted to sell me some used women’s clothing, I might pass on that, as well. Unless I knew his sister was having a closet sale.

I would not want to buy a used black & white tv that’s full of tubes, has a rotary tuning knob and only gets channels 2-13.

Or a slightly-used tube of Preparation H.