Sunday, June 01, 2008

Certain Maxims of Archy

Archy was a giant cockroach who lived in the newsroom where writer Don Marquis worked. In the morning, if Don left paper in his typewriter, he would find Archy had jumped from key to key to leave him a message. Unable to capitalize, it had a sort of free-form poetry to it. I have to put it in prose to fit the space I have. He collected some under the heading, “Certain Maxims of Archy.”

if you get gloomy just take an hour off and sit and think how much better this world is than hell of course it won t cheer you up much if you expect to go there

old doc einstein has abolished time but they haven t got the news at sing sing yet

time time said old king tut is something i ain t got anything but

an optimist is a guy that has never had much experience

that stern and rockbound coast felt like an amateur when it saw how grim the puritans that landed on it were

i once heard the survivors of a colony of ants that had been partially obliterated by a cow s foot seriously debating the intention of the gods towards their civilization

don t cuss the climate it probably doesn t like you any better than you like it