Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Death Comes To The Wrestling Impressario

Or did it? Yes, fans of World Wrestling Entertainment saw a live match from our local arena on the USA Network, on “Mr. McMahon Appreciation Night.” He owns the WWE and, after all was over, fans in the arena as well as on tv saw him leave the arena, step into his car and then it blew up.

That’s not how the Wilkes-Barre Township Fire and Police Departments, Zenith Pyrotechnology and the arena owners remember it. They recall that part as having been taped two nights earlier, around three in the morning, with a township permit.

The tv crew at the arena recall it as having been a bit of “smoke and mirrors,” where the 3:00 a.m. business was inserted into the live show at the right moment.

WWE recalls it as a moment when media from all over the country dropped their usual cynicism faster than someone dropping their pants during an attack of diarrhea. Warner Bros. asked if the body was at the coroner’s yet, but the Chief Deputy Coroner said, “I don’t know what the heck you’re talking about.”

The police chief issued a statement saying, “Vince lives on. I wish him a speedy recovery. I’m sure he’s sitting in a nice hotel room in Trump Plaza laughing like a bastard.”

One of the local newspapers went along with the gag the next day, making up their front page like a supermarket tabloid report of the event. Nothing like pro wrestling, folks.

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