Tom's Helpful Hints When Driving
Carma: The automotive equivalent of Karma. What you do unto others will eventually be done unto you. I firmly believe that aggressive drivers get their bumpers handed to them on a platter. Ex.: Friend of mine was on the Interstate when snow dictated she go 35; SUV’s were passing her at posted speed. She called me twice, once to report the incidents and again to tell me said vehicles were in the median, either skidded off or wheels-up.
Getting the green: Some places have “automatic green” for ambulances. Around here, they can change reds to greens to help them get to the hospital quicker. Fall in behind them and take advantage of modern technology. Also, people will get out of your way.
Speaking of the yellow and green: There is an unlimited supply of them. Really. I’ve learned that life is so much better when you don’t try to beat an old yellow, because the driver to your side might be wanting to beat a yet-to-be-born green. That can be (a) painful and/or (b) expensive. Remember, the turtle beat the rabbit.
Somebody tailgating you? Don’t play games; let them pass. Put on your turn signal, pull over to the right, slow down and let the idiot go. Driving isn’t a game you need to win and the roads aren’t racetracks where the person in front wins. See “Carma,” above; you may find them in a ditch or on the business end of flashing blue and red lights. Don’t beep your horn and wave as you go by; just gloat to yourself.
Getting the green: Some places have “automatic green” for ambulances. Around here, they can change reds to greens to help them get to the hospital quicker. Fall in behind them and take advantage of modern technology. Also, people will get out of your way.
Speaking of the yellow and green: There is an unlimited supply of them. Really. I’ve learned that life is so much better when you don’t try to beat an old yellow, because the driver to your side might be wanting to beat a yet-to-be-born green. That can be (a) painful and/or (b) expensive. Remember, the turtle beat the rabbit.
Somebody tailgating you? Don’t play games; let them pass. Put on your turn signal, pull over to the right, slow down and let the idiot go. Driving isn’t a game you need to win and the roads aren’t racetracks where the person in front wins. See “Carma,” above; you may find them in a ditch or on the business end of flashing blue and red lights. Don’t beep your horn and wave as you go by; just gloat to yourself.
posted by Tom Carten at 10:26 AM
1 Comments:
Somebody tailgating you? Don’t play games; let them pass. Put on your turn signal, pull over to the right, slow down and let the idiot go.
It should be so easy.
The other night I was zipping along on the interstate in the left (of two) lanes. There was a long line of traffic ahead of me, and we were all slowly overtaking a long line of traffic to our collective right.
And then I see the grill of a massive truck threatening to join me in my back seat. There really was no where to go.
I wish there were a way to set up a message scroll across the back window. Mine would say "Back off, Bozo".
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