Bambi Goes To Church

As I was parking my car for church this morning, I saw a deer walking along the back of the lot. That sort of thing is not completely unknown around here, as all our communities back up to the hills and their wooded cover pretty quickly. We’ve had deer running through the Kingston business district, and even had a bear walking around Wilkes-Barre for an evening, until the game commission shot a tranq dart into it and hauled the sleeping bruin back to the hills.

I just never happened to see a deer pacing around the woods, and some open area, near the church before. “Maybe,” I thought, “it’s visiting from another woods and just wants to attend Mass.” And maybe not.

The deer went into the woods by the parish hall. “Uh-oh,” I said to myself. “What else goes into the woods? Bears, that’s what; we’ve all heard that. Popes are Catholic and bears go into the woods. That deer won’t make it to Mass if there is a bear in there. Luckily, there isn’t.

But either Bambi is not Catholic, or she is not a church-goer, because she never does make it inside. During the service, I wonder if she has made it over the parish fence, or possibly found a way around it.

The alternate, if course, is that Bambi was trying to find the Stella Presbyterian Church in nearby Forty Fort. She should have known she was lost; the WASPS who settled Forty Fort did not allow any of those Romans to build a Papist church in their borough.