Tuesday, January 11, 2011

"Your Call Isn't Important To Us."

“Hello. This is United Association of Associations.”
>>Hi. This is Tom Carten…
“Your call is very important to us. At the moment, all our representatives are busy with other customers. Please stay on the line and a customer service representative will be with you shortly.”
>>[Kenny G airport music.]

Time passes. The clock slowly moves ahead. Calendar pages flip. Trees blossom, leaves change color, people start to wear heavy coats. Kenny G music keeps playing.

“Thank you for waiting.”
>>Tom Carten here.
“We are sorry for the delay.”
>>I wanted to speak to someone…
“All our representatives are still busy. Please stay on the line.”

Babies are conceived and born, parents age and eventually pass on, presidents run for office and European governments fall. Kenny G music plays.

“This is Terri; may I help you?”
>>Hi Terri. This is Tom. It’s about my prescription plan.
“I’m sorry; that office closed fifteen minutes ago.”